Yongey Mingyur Dorje Rinpoche
Dealing With Emotions
Kagyu Samye Ling March 2004. Translation Karma Chödrak. © by 2005 Mingyur Rinpoche
This morning there is going to be a discussion about dealing with the emotions. There are two types of emotions: negative and positive. The negative emotions we have to abandon and the virtuous or positive emotions we need to accomplish. If one practices the virtuous actions then there is a benefit from that for a beginner. How do we reject some of these emotions and how do we adopt the other ones? How do we actually go about doing that?
Generally speaking, how do the emotions arise? - They come about because of grasping. If one is very tightly bounded by the grasping, then negative emotions arise from that. If one lessens one's grasping and tightness with the emotions, then through the lessening of the grasping one can have some wisdom arising from that. Less grasping connected with knowledge becomes positive emotion. Strong grasping connected with emotion becomes negative emotion. Positive and negative emotions both are based on grasping.
First we will be explaining how to deal with the negative emotions. We need to achieve some balance in the mind. If one attains a state of balance within one's mind then negative emotions can't harm one. Where do the negative emotions normally come from, how do they arise? It's because one is too tight. Having too tight state in the mind, the negative emotions arise from that. What is the technique or method to liberate oneself from this tightness? - First one needs wisdom or intelligence. If one has some intelligence regarding the emotions then one sees that being too tight is without meaning and that the negative emotions arise from tightness. One has to understand in an intelligent way that there is no meaning to the negative emotions.
Now I'm going to give you an example. There is a person with great attachment to their face. They are too tight. The person thinks: "I have a very beautiful face, I am handsome." The person is looking in a mirror everyday. "The picture looks even better than me." Having too tight grasping for the beauty of one's face, eventually one will see a fault in it. Even there is no fault in there one will perceive a fault. If there is a tiny fault or blemish, on becomes sad. "My mouth is too big, oh dear…" Further on one looks every day again and again in the mirror: "Oh dear..." So then you try to chance the face, the way you look. But it's not really much of use to try to do that. Then you think: whatever it is, it's wrong, it's not very good. "What shall I do?" Every day you look in the mirror and see the mistake. You are more ugly every day. After one month you think you are really ugly. Finally one sees the fault which doesn't really exist being a big fault. Then you start to think: "Maybe other people are seeing this fault. Then you think: "Oh, that person is looking at my fault! My crooked nose. Yes, he is really looking at me." Then you get quite embarrassed and you are unable to speak. Your speech gets interrupted, you are coughing and blushing. After some time one is not able to go outside in the public. Even though nobody is looking at your nose at all you think they are. From time to time one may think: "Actually, are they really looking me or not? Maybe it's my wrong perception." Then you have to examine or test it. In the end you get wrong information. Having tested it, it is still wrong information and you think: "They are really looking at me, I'm certain of that." So, on top of that you get more grasping, more tightness.
There is no meaning in that. You are actually fine, there is nothing wrong. That's the beginning of all different types of negative emotions. Carrying on that way they become bigger and bigger. Based on that, one feels loneliness, embarrassment, fear, and also depression. All these negative emotions will arise from that. But if you look at it really, there is no need for that, it's just made by one's own mind. So you need to understand that. That's called intelligence. That intelligence liberates you.
Misunderstanding in the first place - not knowing that the emotions and misperceptions come from one's own mind - one starts to think erroneously that they come or rely on external objects, so you think: "That person is good, that person is bad, this is not nice, and this is nice." All this comes from one's own mind and because one doesn't recognise that one puts the emphasis on external objects, thinking that they rely on them.
If you look at it from another point of view, when somebody says that a crooked nose is very good, that means that you are handsome and fortunate. So if you have a great trust in somebody who says you have a crooked nose and that's very nice, you will have happiness. Also you will like that person. If you have that kind of information from many friends, doctor or whoever, you will trust them. "If I have crooked nose, it's very good." Then if you see in a mirror: "Oh, I don't have a crooked nose. Yes, I need to have a crooked nose. What shall I do? Every day maybe push it like this!" Not to have a crooked nose is very sad, maybe you need to go to hospital and have plastic surgery. "Please put plastic in here, make a crooked nose." Then you look in the mirror: "Fantastic, handsome!" Then you walk and think: "I have a nice face, they are looking at me, and I'm very beautiful." There is another side, you know.
The main point is that one's mind makes all of this. One needs to understand that, to have that intelligence. If one understands that, it's like releasing a knot. One is relieved from that. These days a lot of things like that arise. These days we call the time of the five degenerations. There are lot of fighting and arguments and these are based on this kind of misunderstanding. But if you look at it really, there is no meaning to any of that. But misunderstanding one thing for another, you have the idea: "This person is bad" and so on. Many negative things can arise from that misunderstanding.
So then apart from one's own idea, one's own perception, you can't see anybody else's, only one's own. So then all the time we make our own kind of box where we put ourselves in. Whatever comes into the box is good, whatever doesn't fit, what is left outside, is no good. Then one's mind becomes smaller and smaller.
Now I am going to give you another example. There is a person who likes to eat chillies a lot. The person thinks: "If I eat chillies I'll be very happy, they are very tasty." He is certain of it and goes off to another person, who doesn't like chillies. So he thinks: "That person is not that good. He doesn't like chillies." In your mind you have a thought like that. As I said before, you make a little box for yourself and everything that fits inside is good. If it doesn't fit inside your box, it's not good. In this case you are thinking: "Chillies are very good," that's kind of making your box. If that person was to like chillies he would fit inside the box you've made. If the other person thinks the chillies are not good and they make them ill, you will think: "What's wrong with them?" And you think: "Well, they don't fit in my box, they are bad."
Based on that, one makes oneself separate from others. "I'm good, they are bad. I'm clever, I've got lots of qualities, and they are stupid." One divides oneself up like this and then arguments. Difficulties arisen from that. World War one and two, these arose from that kind of small thing, in the beginning.
"That person is taller than me, I don't like them. That person is smaller than me, I don't like them." I don't like. What ever it is you don't like, you talk a lot about it. "That person talks a lot, I don't like him. He speaks more than I do. That guy has no qualities, he is no good. He speaks less than me." But really, everybody is the same, aren't they. Everybody is the same because everybody wants to experience happiness and nobody wants to experience suffering. So we are all like one family. Everybody possesses the buddhanature. The buddhanature is something very pure, clean and wonderful, and we all possess that. When we say "buddhanature", it sounds like a very fancy name, but if you can call it sentient beings' nature, it's the identical meaning. So, everybody's essence is actually very good. This is human intelligence and that's a very good thing. The essence of everybody is very pure. So we are all the same, how can you say we are all the same, because everybody wishes to experience happiness and everybody wants to be free of the suffering. We don't have to make any boundaries or differences between people. Because we misunderstand that point then we make boundaries between people. Because of these self-made boundaries between people the destructive emotions, negative emotions, all of these arise from that.
That was just a general sharing of information. In brief you can say that whatever suffering one has it normally starts from a very small beginning. Something very small in the first stage. Having grasping for that it becomes more and more. That's also same for what we call positive emotions. They start very small in the beginning and they get greater and greater. It's said in the texts that whatever habit one has, it becomes easier and easier, even it feels difficult in the beginning. It becomes easier through the habit. All our emotions arise based on habit. So then, if we have a bad habit and we have a strong clinging to that, strong tightness with that, it gets worse, stronger and stronger. If you have a good habit, there will be a good result from that.
How many negative emotions are there then? We call them the six poisons. Based on the six poisons you can have fear arising and depression and also a feeling of disgust and sadness. These are all called negative emotions. How do these arise? As was explained before one becomes very tight with the grasping and then one makes a big difference between oneself and others. Based on that all the negative emotions arise. So I'm going to explain to you how they arise.
First we have anger. First of all one has oneself and then other and one thinks: "I'm good and that person is not so important. I'm very important." That's a boundary between you two. It's quite strong boundary and based on that comes anger. "That person caused harm to me." That's anger. "I try to beat, kill or fight them. I say various things to make his head spin." What is the object of the anger, actually? The object is something that is not pleasing to the mind. We call it a bad object but who makes the bad object? The bad object is only made in one's own mind. Even if you call it a bad object, it's still made from one's own mind.
That was the anger, and now we have the pride: "This person has got absolutely no qualities at all. He is just nothing. I'm much better than them, I've got more qualities than him, I've got more money, I'm more famous, I can meditate better than him. That person is not so good meditator. I'm the best one. I've got very good experience, I think no-one else has experience like that." The pride comes about by thinking that the object is much less than you. Thinking that the person (the object) has no qualities is made by your own mind. Who knows whether they've got qualities or not. One is not able to 100% find out or perceive that. That person has also got the buddhanature. That person also wants to have the happiness and be free from suffering, exactly the same as oneself.
The third one is desire. It is based on a pleasing (good) object. "Oh, that's really good, it's nice. I need that. I want to get that object. I desire it." So then, without any control one runs after it. One runs after the object of desire. If you get a very strong desire, you are not able to eat your meal. At night you can't sleep. "I need this, I need that." And if it gets worse and worse you will become crazy. So that's called the good or pleasing object. If you ask: "What is a pleasing object then?" - Your mind makes it.
The fourth one is jealousy. It arises by thinking that the object is equal to oneself. "Me and that person, we are the same, but maybe eventually this person is better than me. That's no good. We are the same, but everybody likes him and not me. How can I do something to him? What can I do to prevent that person from getting better than me? To obstruct him from getting better than me I need to do something. What kind of method can I use? Perhaps I can use a peaceful method." You speak to one person against the other. "He says that you are not good." You tell other people that, like a gossip. With divisive speech you try to break up two people and the two people who were friendly become separate because of your divisive speech. Then you think the power of the person you are jealous of becomes less and less. "They are getting less than me now, good." If you can't get any result using the peaceful way, then you have to use a wrathful method. Then you actually argue with them, fight with them. But there is not much benefit in that. You get the harm in the end. If you use divisive speech, in the final you will get a bad result coming from that. So there is no meaning in that because one doesn't benefit from that. Actually one's enemies will increase. The first object (the person) will not like you and then the second person you try to use your divisive speech on, they also won't like you. So you got two enemies now.
Then we have stinginess. If you don't know what stinginess really mean I'm going to give you more explanation! If you were to go to town for example, and you met one person begging. "Give me money," if you have a bad mind you think: "That person is trying to get me to waste my money." If you have a good mind, you think: "Maybe I give some." You look inside your pocket and take out something. It's a fifty pound note. "This is too much!" You put it back in your pocket. Again you find something. A twenty pound note. That's also too much. You put it back. Again you take something out. A ten pound note. That's a little bit too much. Eventually you get a pound coin. Okay. You give the beggar the pound coin. Having given that pound you go off home. At home you think: "I gave a pound. That's not really very small. It's a lot; I could have bought some toothpaste with that pound. I could have bought some tissue paper. Now I can't. That's not very good. I've wasted my pound." That’s stinginess.
If one gets a habit of that again and again, one can't even eat one's food. You just eat small amount of food. You don't wear good clothes, even though you've got money. Even if you have got millions and billions you won't spend it. Even if you gave one pound you get a very stingy feeling about that. You are not able to buy a good car. You can't actually utilise your wealth. When you die, you can use it then! Even if you were in actuality a rich person, if you've got a lot of stinginess, you can't get a lot of benefit from that because you can't use it.
The sixth one is the ignorance. Ignorance is actually the root of all the other ones, the previous five. It is the root of all of them, because one doesn't really understand the object on which one's negative emotion is based. Because one doesn't understand the natural state of all the phenomena, all the different objects, one gives arise to the negative emotions through that ignorance. If you really understand the natural state of the phenomena and the objects, then you don't give arise to the negative emotions. The ignorance is like the basis or root, from which all the other negative emotions arise from. Based on these six negative emotions or six mind poisons, all of the fear, depression, loneliness, all these things come up from that. If one doesn't accomplish one's wishes or one's desires, one has loneliness and dissatisfaction from that. So then, if your enemies are able to cause harm to you, you give rise to fear.
If one is really under the power of these six conflicting emotions or the disturbing negative emotions, mind poisons, under the power of those six emotions, one is not able to achieve peace of mind. In the absence of those six it's quite difficult to experience loneliness and fear. It won't happen, it won't come. Sadness, suffering, loneliness and fear won't come. The reason that these things arise in the first place is base on these six mind poisons. How is it that the six poisons arise? They come about through misunderstanding. What is it that we misunderstand? One is, that oneself is tight and also thinking that oneself is here and somebody else is there; self and other, and then making a boundary between them. And also thinking that happiness and suffering are based on external objects. One doesn't achieve one's wishes because one thinks that the happiness and suffering are based on external objects. If one doesn't get what one wants, in the end you think that the external object is bad, that's the fault. So, one thinks mainly of the external objects.
If one has the intelligence - what I'm talking about now is related to the first level of intelligence - the main thing is the mind. However, you think the external object can be the cause. It helps, but it's not the main reason. There is an example going back to nose. You need a nose first, don't you? That's the cause. Based on having a nose, the condition or the cause, one can have two experiences, positive or negative. If you think that a bent nose is bad, you have a bad experience. If you think that a bent nose is good, then you have a good experience. What are these based on? They are based on the nose itself. But whether the bent nose is going to give you happiness or sadness is nothing definite. You can't say definitely. What does it depend on, then? Definitely it depends on ones mind. Therefore the main thing is the mind. But the nose helps with that. If you don't have a nose, those two perceptions won't come, because you don't have a basis for the perceptions to arise, there is no nose. That's for the first level of intelligence, it's like a basis, but if one gets deeper into it the basis is lost. That liberates the mind poisons. If you want to explain that, it's the view of emptiness. That's an advanced level of intelligence.
Based on that, the Buddha has taught the two truths: the relative truth and the ultimate truth. If you understand the state of the relative truth, one is able to pacify many of the mind poisons; one is able to pacify lots of suffering. For example, if you have a wrong perception regarding your nose, what is the relative truth of that? Actually your nose is fine all the time. You have the misperception of your nose being big, bent, this way and that way. That's the relative illusion. Relatively it's not like that. Relatively speaking I don't have any horns on my head. That's an illusion. Illusion means the relative aspect. There are two types of relative truth, the relative of the relative and the ultimate of the relative. Within this relative we also have a relative to a relative. There are many like that. Even if the nose is not bent we think it is. We perceive it like that.
Understanding the intelligence level getting more and more advanced and clear, understanding the emptiness, even the basis, the nose doesn't exist. At that point, the advanced stage, all of one's negative emotions, all of one's defilements are completely purified.
The subject covered this morning mainly is the intelligence. Based on that, do you have any questions?
Translator: The lady says she wants to make a comment. As explained in the teaching the root of negativity, negative emotions is ignorance, and having practised for quite sometime she has come to realise something which wasn't mentioned in the teachings that this kind of ignorance can start when we are children and also lot of outside things contribute to its arising.
Rinpoche: Ignorance is present in the children but it is also explained in the teachings that even before you are child, in the previous lifetime, from beginningless lifetimes we have had ignorance. So it's always there. It's not been said that at the time of being a child one doesn't have ignorance. It's implied that one has always had it. During the previous lifetime one has had ignorance.
Some therapies relate a lot with the childhood but in the Buddhist way you think: "Well, where does the child come from?" Childs habits come from the previous lifetime. So then, even though the parents of the child might be very nice and kind, the child itself might have bad habits and these come from a previous lifetime. Maybe the child is very sensitive. Due to this sensitivity the child perceives a small fault but makes it very big.
The other case is that the parents may be extremely bad and the child him- or herself is actually very nice, very pleasant child. Can have like that. What's the reason for this? The habits come from previous lifetimes. So then the fault can't harm one.
Question: As was explained, intelligence is the remedy for the mind poisons, the negative emotions, but when one is actually in a situation having some trouble with the person, then at that point it's quite difficult to remember or have an idea of the intelligence. So at that time when there is a trouble happening or some conflict, how important is it to have compassion?
Rinpoche: It depends on one's habit. First of all one has to understand about the intelligence having small problems, and after ones habit becomes more strong with the intelligence one uses it with the situation and of course one can generate compassion during that time as well. One starts with a small thing like whether one's nose is crooked or not. If one has this kind of fault in one's nose and one has confidence and habit that it is good, even in the future someone says to you: "Having a bent nose is no good," you won't trust them, because you have the habit yourself. So it depends on one's habit. It's like the strength of one's practice.
Question: In the west a lot of us have self-hatred, guilt, and looking the Tibetans, they don't seem to have that problem. Where do the self-hatred and guilt come from, what's the root of this?
Rinpoche: You can have two reasons for that. One is that in Tibetan culture Buddha has taught that everyone has identical buddha-essence, one has these qualities, that is one reason. It is very common for people to feel that. Because of that knowledge - everyone has a common knowledge and appreciates one's own essence and feels that I've got a lot of qualities, I'm a very good person without being proud. The second reason could be the society. In the western society there are a lot of things to think about, isn't there? Crazy monkey. Yes, no, yes, no. In Tibetan culture they don't really have this idea: I'm bad, I'm good. They don’t have that coming up. If you tell them that, they don't understand. "I'm useless, I don't have enough courage…" They say: "What are you talking about??" They will think you are quite like a strange person if you say that.
Question: What does Rinpoche rate our chances of accomplishing the meditation and realising all this?
Rinpoche: You've got more chance, actually. If you have mind poisons, negative emotions burning like a fire, from that you get even more blazing of the wisdom, because of interdependence.
Question: What is the benefit of going on pilgrimage to holy places where yogis and yoginis have meditated? There aren't many places like that in our part of the world.
Rinpoche: If you go, it's very good. You can think: "This is a holy place." Like a pure land. Samye Ling has received blessings of many lamas. Dharma teachings have been happening here and many lamas have visited and so on. Many things have come together in this one place. That's where holy places come from. We don't have a holy place from nothing. It has to come about from these various things coming together. So you can make your own home a holy place. Make a nice shrine. Very simple, but very pleasing to look at. Put the representations of the body, speech and mind of the Buddha there. If you think about that in a very nice way, that's a holy place.
Question: What about outside?
Rinpoche: All the men are dakas, all the women are dakinis, the environment is holy pureland, that's the best holy place.
Question: If one is lucky not to have strong mind poisons but the others are angry towards you, expressing their mind poisons towards you, what do you do about that?
Rinpoche: You can take it. You do the tonglen, sending and taking. If you think: "Oh, that person is harming me, I'm going to get worse and worse, then it will become bad for you. If you take it, it's beneficial for you. Then you are using the imagination of a white light going out to the other person, giving all your virtue, all your goodness to that person and in a smoky grey light from them you absorb all their negativity, all their anger all the dreadful things, you take that in, exchange, sending and taking. Then the other person's negativity is beneficial for you.
If I use an example, you are going along a very dangerous path and there are lots of enemies there, thieves and brigands. Even if one has got many protectors and guards with you, the enemy can still harm you. Sometimes they fight you, you fight them back. It would be quite difficult, wouldn't it? However, if you were transform all those enemies into friends, who is going to harm you? You transform them into friends, so they are only able to help you and there is no such thing as an enemy. It's like that.
Translator: The lady experienced last year that a thief stole a lot of her stuff. She is thinking whether to approach it in a way of making an offering of that as a kind of act of generosity or should she get a police involved.
Rinpoche: It's okay to get the police involved, because if that thief continuously steals in the end for that person it's not very good, and also all the other people he/she is going to continue stealing from, it's not good for them either. He/she is continually creating more and more negativity for himself or herself. If you are not able to recover the things which have been stolen from you, then you just let go and do the sending and taking. One practices with the light thinking loving-kindness and compassion for the thief. All the things that were lost you can offer them like a mandala.
Question: Relating back to some of the stories in the previous days there are different types of faith, for example the dogs tooth and the old lady having as it's described blind faith thinking that it is pure when it's actually not, so how can it be that having this kind of blind faith or faith without real intelligence, how can that transform external objects? How does that come about? So, could Rinpoche talk little bit about blind faith.
Rinpoche: There are two things. As it was said in the other day, first of all when you have faith in a lama you have to examine that lama and see if he possesses all of the qualities and various things that a genuine lama should possess. He needs a lineage and an ability to have benefit for the others. He needs to have pure commitments. One needs to examine that and test that. Who is it that we should have faith towards? If the person has the pure lineage, pure commitments, pure activity, these type of persons, we need to have the faith for them. First we have to establish that, and then one really has to have faith in that.
So don't look to any kind of lama just going here and there. First one has to examine the lama. And if one thinks that the lama is good, then as much as one is able to have faith and devotion to that lama, that's good. At least the lama needs to have the right appearance, qualities. But if the lama is not a bodhisattva of the first to the tenth level, if he is not like that, then there is not any difference. If he has got the right characteristics of a lama, if he in at the 1st or 8th bodhisattva level, is no difference, it's all the same. The blessing depends on one's faith, depends on oneself then. So that's not blind faith. Having that thinking all the reasons why one should have faith for a person, if one doesn't think about them and without reason has faith, that's what you are talking about.
That's related to the relative. If you look at it from the ultimate point of view - at the moment we are involved with the relative, aren't we? On one side we have to rely on this relative truth. On the other side we have to rely on being free of that relative. These two are the wisdom and skilful means together. If we go on this path, eventually the relative is completely liberated from that. Giving arise to the faith for the lama one has to rely on the relative. If we rely on the relative, if the lama gives us a wrong teaching, then we can go on to a wrong path in fact. So that's not good. For that reason one has to look very well and examine very well in the first instant. That's a necessity and that's connected with the relative.
If you look at it from the ultimate point of view, Mao Tse-tung caused a lot of harm to Tibetans but one doesn't need to have any connection with Mao Tse-tung oneself, one doesn't have to receive any teachings from him. So you don't have a relative connection with him, you don't need one. From ultimate point of view, if you think Mao Tse-tung is Buddha, that's fine. Why? Mao Tse-tung's essence is the buddhanature, isn't it? He is the same as the Buddha. So there is a reason for that. What is the reason for the nature of Mao Tse-tung to be that of the Buddha? - He possesses the buddhanature. If you think like that, you will get a blessing from that. So then one relies on the relative path and the ultimate path together.
Going back to the story of the old mother and the tooth, she didn't take dharmateachings from the tooth. So she did not break any commitment of samaya with the tooth. The dog's tooth is not a false lama. That dog's toot is not able to give any false teachings. The dog's tooth is not able to have any broken commitment. So, one doesn’t have any relative connection with that dog's tooth. The old lady looked it from the ultimate standpoint but she perceived it as a pure thing. So there is benefit from that. The nature of the dogs toot is to be emptiness, isn't it? The emptiness is the dharmakaya. The emptiness and the dharmakaya are identical. Based on that, blessing was obtained. That's not an example of blind faith.
Question: If the old lady's object of faith was an impure lama, what would happen?
Rinpoche: That would be very bad. The lama and the student both would go down to the lower realms. There is an example. In Tibet there are yaks. Another yak-like animal is called dzo. They are both very strong. When they fight their horns get interlocked and pulling each other eventually they both fall down.
Question: But still the essence of the bad lama is emptiness.
Rinpoche: If there was a bad lama but one had a very high realisation from the ultimate point of view, and one wasn't staying very close to him, not depending on the lama and wouldn't need teaching from the lama, you were not connected with that lama but you attained high realisation, you can think that lama is Buddha and you can get blessing. Because of that we can say it's one taste, the inseparability of the samsara and nirvana. How can one say that? - The essence of samsara is nirvana, isn't it? All the faults and mistakes, the essence of that is not truly existent. The true essence of that is nirvana.
It's important that one goes together with the relative and the ultimate. The reason for that is that right now we are involved very much with the relative. If one goes beyond the relative, then one doesn't have to rely on the relative.
Question: The given fact that all possess the buddhanature, we are all identical on that level, how do the different various vacations come from. For example some people have very much skill on one area, other people don't, they all have different manifestations of work, how does this come about, relating to the fact that we have all got the identical buddhanature?
Rinpoche: That comes around from the interdependence. Where does the interdependence come from? That comes from ignorance. Your essence has the five qualities. If one doesn't recognise those five qualities they transform into the five poisons and based on that comes the five elements and the five skandhas and the five different types of path. And also the different types of people. So you have vajra-family people. The vajra-family people have a lot of anger. They are quite stable but they have got anger. The ratna-family, they need to do a lot of activity and they need to get a lot of things, and they have got pride. Like that there are forms or families of people. A lot of different types of people come from that. Some people have connection with one type of family people, some with two or three. So, if you recognize them, they can be transformed into the five wisdoms. Five bodies. Five wisdoms, five bodies, all the qualities of a Buddha can arise from that recognition.
Question: Would Rinpoche say a little bit of impartiality and is it okay to have a little bit discernment in day to day life?
Rinpoche: Yes, it is beneficial. When we find ourselves in the relative world we have to have that in order to survive in that environment. So we need to have discernment and this has two tasks. Oneself on has to survive for the lifetime in that environment and the secondly one has to realise the nature of all phenomena, the dharmata. That is also discernment.
Question: Concerning fear, does Rinpoche think we should approach in a very peaceful way and observe it or should one engage in it rather like going into a scary situation and seeing what happens then with the fear?
Rinpoche: You can do both. First of all if you can train with small fear, that's good. You can deal easily with a small fear, you start with that. Then if you can train and get a habit of that, then you can get better later. If you arrive in a very fearful spot, you will be able to do that very easily, straight away, start off with a small fear.
Here is an example. One has a baby, same family or type as the grown up person. The small baby can't fight the grown up person, but they are both people, aren't they? When the baby gets bigger he can thumb the big person. It's like that. We call this baby-wisdom. If you use that, it's beneficial. At this level we can only fight another baby. When we grow up we can fight the grown ups, too. However, if something frightening happens, you don't need to be afraid. If one experiences fear coming up, one can transform it to the path. At that point your baby-wisdom will be beneficial for one or two seconds. Then again the fear arises and then again you look. Five or ten seconds later the fear will come up. So if you do this again and again repeatedly, that's the best medicine; the baby-wisdom will get bigger and bigger. It's like exercising in the baby-wisdom. It's like if you feed the baby good food it grows up very quickly, doesn't it. If you don't exercise it, it doesn't get food, it will be very weak. The best food is a challenge.
Question: What are the benefits of a bardo retreat?
Rinpoche: It's very beneficial. It's for a very lazy person. Easy to get enlightened. You won't be enlightened in this body. When you die, in a bardo after that there are three bardos. The bardo of death, the bardo of dharmata and the bardo of possibility. The next life will come from the bardo of possibility. In each of these three bardos it is possible to reach buddhahood. It's very quick. First recognize, secondly get stability, thirdly liberation. You may become a buddha or a high level of bodhisattva. It is very easy, because you don't have a coarse body, you have a subtle body. Based on the recognition of having a subtle body one can achieve a swift liberation. Then one doesn't have any gross illusions, only very subtle illusions.
Sönam deji tam-che zig-pa nyi
tob-ne nye-pei dra nam pam che ne
tse ga na chi palab drupa ji
sipe cho-le dro va drol-var sho.
Due to this good karma, may I achieve omniscience,
Defeat the harmful enemies within me,
And free beings from the sea of existence
That is churned by the waves of birth, ageing, sickness and death.
What we are talking about, is how to deal with the positive and negative emotions. At the moment we are discussing how to deal with the negative emotions. As was discussed this morning, the negative emotions, that was covering the first stage of wisdom. It was said that the main cause of the arising of mind poisons or negative emotions was grasping or tightness, being tight with oneself. You can also call that ignorance. Ignorance is the source or the cause of all of the mind poisons. If you ask: where is the beginning of the ignorance, there is no beginning. So, it's beginningless. If the ignorance has no beginning and through that ignorance we experience the cyclic samsaric rebirth again and again, how do we get the remedy for that? - The remedy for ignorance is based on wisdom, (skt. prajna, tib. sherab).
In Tibetan there are two words: rig and ma-rig. Rig means wisdom and marig means no wisdom. So there is a big difference between these two. When one is learning about the first stage of wisdom, the explanation has to do with how the main thing is the mind. So if one realises that the main thing is the mind, one derives benefit from that. What's the reason for that? It's because oneself holds oneself tight. Having the thought: "I can't practice, I can't do anything, I'm no good," one can't even practice, because one feels everything relies on external one, but then, what actually happens is one makes oneself tight, so there is no benefit from that. Then one thinks in one's mind: "Practising has no benefit," because one thinks that the happiness and the suffering rely on external objects. One thinks 100% it's lying on outside objects. Because of that one has the tightness. Then you have the thought: I can't train things, I can't transform things. But if you have the opposite of that and think that the main thing is the mind, it's like opening the door. Then one sees that one can transform anything, one can change anything. That's like the first stage of wisdom, opening the door.
Now we are going to go into the second stage. Within the second stage there are two aspects. One is the five mind poisons: jealousy, pride, anger, stinginess and the ignorance and the other side is to do with suffering like fear, depression or sadness. These are the two aspects.
So I'm going to explain to you how to practice using the suffering. What can happen is generally in our mind we have this situation where we can have lack of confidence and fear. So, suffering comes from that. What we need to do is to get a method to remove or pacify that. Why we need to get a remedy is because we have suffering from these, so we need to remove them. For example if one has the suffering of depression and fear and so on arising and accompanying that one has the thought: "This fear is not good for me, suffering is bad for me, I don't want to have this depression;" this thought of not wanting these things and pushing them away actually gives strength for them and makes them worse, makes them grow.
So, like for example with the nose which is slightly crooked, if you think that's a very bad thing to have - the thought of not wanting to have that thing makes the fear worse in one's own mind. If you have the opposite to that regarding the defect of the nose, if one doesn't have much hope connected with that thinking that I have a hope to get rid of it, if one doesn't have any fear about it: "Well whether it's there or not, it doesn't matter," then whatever suffering arises from that it will be lessened quite a lot, it will be hardly there at all.
The first cause we have to remove is the idea which comes up with the suffering thinking that suffering is something I don't want to have, I don't want to experience this, it has to be got rid of. That's the first thought we need to address. If you can pacify that then everything else will become easy. If we really have the courage and confidence in our minds, whatever manifest we can control and transform that whatever it is.
There are two reasons why worrying about suffering and thinking it's not good for oneself, is not beneficial. The first is that there is no benefit in worrying and secondly one can make many problems from that. Out of the two I will explain the first one.
There is no benefit in suffering and suffering is not necessary. If one has problems and suffering and one doesn't wish to have them, at the time one is experiencing suffering and problems one has to think about it very well and see if one can have remedy for the problems and suffering or not. Is there anything I can do or not? If there is something you can do, a remedy exists, if you can make it better, you don't have to worry about it, do you? You know the method. So then, if one has the remedy and a way of getting out from the problems and suffering, what is the point of sitting there and thinking: "Oh, I'm suffering; there is nothing I can do!" One knows the remedy, so there is no point in worrying anymore because everything is going to work out okay, isn't it?
If one doesn't have a remedy or methods to get rid of the problem and suffering, if one continues to suffer from that, there is no benefit either. What is going to happen, will happen, I don't have a remedy for that, so what's the point of worrying? If it was beneficial for the suffering to worry about it, if crying about it would make the situation better, then to cry would be okay. Cry as much as you want. You could pull out your hair. Pull as much as you want, but it doesn't make any benefit to it, because you have not found a remedy to address this problem.
I shall use an example of a stock market. A stock market from time to time goes down and down. If you worry about that and cry: "Oh, my stocks, all gone," one keeps crying and pulling out one's hair and if one breaks the crockery and cups, it won't make the stock go up even one pound. If by pulling your hair out, crying, smashing of the crockery and chocking things out of the window would make the stock market go up one pound that would be really good. If you were to do that, that would be great! You should do as much you could. But it doesn't have any benefit, does it? So there is no benefit to worry at that point.
There are two points. One is the explanation of being no benefit, because if you have got a remedy to an easy situation, you don't need to worry about it. If one has got a remedy, what's the point of worrying? The second point is of making things worse. For example there are two people. One of the people is very tight fisted and always thinking about one's own benefit. One has got a very spacious open mind. They've got a diamond like Queen of England's crown jewel, maybe better than that, rubies, emeralds and all kinds of different jewels. And they've got very got very good stocks on the stock market. So they are both very happy and good together.
One day their various jewels which are much better than the Queen of England's jewels, by the way, one day a thief came and took the whole lot. Then the stocks on the market were all crashing down, they came to zero. So they had nothing. How is the guy who was very tight in his mind? "Oh my god, I've got nothing left, and he pulled out his hair and started crying. Maybe he could not eat his food. He could not speak to anybody. He was able to do nothing. He just sat there. He thought: "There is no meaning to the whole world, nothing is meaningful anymore." It's like the sky and earth were turned upside down. Then also he thought finally, that he might commit suicide. And that he might go crazy. It became a very difficult situation for him. He might as well be locked up in a lunatics' asylum.
And the other guy? He knew how things really were, the state of things, and he also had a very open spacious mind. How was he? "Oh, everything is finished! That's impermanence. It comes and goes. Well, no benefit to worry then. Whatever was going to happen it has already happened, so there is no remedy for it. Possessions are in ruin now. It's okay. Maybe I'm more released than before. Before I had to think about the stock markets a lot. Down and down, I don’t need to do that anymore." He is able to eat well and sleep fine. He didn't go crazy, didn't kill himself, and he didn't have to go to hospital. He had a new idea: "I'm going to start another work, another business. The old one was impermanent, it's gone. Everything is impermanent, so I can start something else. Then he will start another business. He thinks: "Whatever I want, I can do it." He has got confidence and courage. The guy who had tightness, he made things worse. So, that was the second reason: making things worse.
Now I will tell you a story about Malaysia. There was a Chinese business man. He was doing business in the stock market about four years. I think he had about 40 million dollars. Then one day he lost everything, but his house. Normally he comes to the dharma centre. All of his relatives came along trying to cheer him up. The guy said: "It's no problem, it's all gone, don't worry." His mother was crying and worrying a lot. So he was trying to make his mother to feel better. It really happened.
There are two main topics here explained. First one is having the thought that suffering is not desired or one doesn't want it, it's bad. Above is the method of pacifying it. So the first topic is finished. The following is an explanation of the second one: how to appreciate it when suffering and problems arise.
Generally speaking, if we have suffering and negative emotions, different types of things going on in the mind and problems, that's a very good situation first to have and to be friends with. It's a good opportunity. Without the conflicting emotions or the mind poisons the wisdom can't blaze. We talk about the six realms of samsaric existence. The god and demigod realms, they are separate from us. It is said that a human body is better than a god body. The reason for that is that the god body, they don't experience very coarse negative emotions. They don't have a cause of suffering. So they are not able to achieve buddhahood in one lifetime, but we have that, don't we? Based on the experiencing of gross suffering we can achieve buddhahood in one lifetime. Based on those two: gross emotions and gross suffering we can do that. Generally speaking then, suffering is a good thing.
Some people like to go rock climbing. When you do rock climbing fear comes up, doesn't it? With rock climbing comes fear, but then you get a great courage from that, and people go climbing to show off. Using the example of the person who goes rock climbing, going up climbing you can face your fear, so you get a great opportunity to go beyond the fear. Likewise with us, if suffering and emotions arise, we have a very good opportunity to come face to face with them. In Tibet the Lamas go off searching for the suffering and problems. I'm going to tell you a story.
There was a great lama in Tibet called Patrul Rinpoche. In Tibet at that time most of the practitioners had heard that Patrul Rinpoche was very well known and very famous. From time to time Patrul Rinpoche would take off his normal clothes and put on very dirty bad clothes and go wandering off in disguise. Patrul Rinpoche was the composer of Kunzang Lame Shellung, The Words of My Perfect Teacher. That text or book got permeated all over Tibet, everybody knew it. His place is called Sachuka, and from there he went to Nangchen one day. He was wearing very rough clothes with tears in them and very shabby looking. In the capital of Nangchen there was a monastery called Sechu gompa, a very big monastery. Behind that monastery up on the hills there were many monks and nuns in retreat. Lots of caves and small retreat huts. Nobody was expecting Patrul Rinpoche to come to Nangchen, they thought some old scruffy chap had come. Because he didn't have any place to sleep he went at the steps of the monastery and lied down to sleep at night. He sat up in the morning, put his hand out and started to beg. He didn't have even shoes.
Anyway, Patrul Rinpoche went circumambulating the monastery and nobody knew he was there. But up on the hills there was one old meditator, he came down to the monastery. So he looked at Patrul Rinpoche but he didn't know who he was, just like a scruffy old man. He said: "You scruffy old man, you haven't even got any shoes, where you come from?" He said: "I've come from Sachuka." "Where are you going now?" "Nothing certain, I'm not sure." "Have you got anything to eat or drink? Come to my place, I've got something to eat and drink there, come with me." So they went together.
Then the old meditator from up on the hills said to Patrul Rinpoche in his disguise: "You've got nothing to eat and drink, but if you stay with me, I'm just here one person alone, you can cook my food and clean up the dust and make everything nice, and I give you some food. So that's benefit for me and benefit for you. And if you've got any interest I will give you some nice dharma teaching." Patrul Rinpoche replied to him: "Oh, if I can get some dharma teaching, it will be very kind of you. Please give me that." The old guy said: "That's good."
So every day Patrul Rinpoche swept the floor and made everything very nice, put the offerings on the shrine and made the old monk's food. Then the old monk said: "I shall give you the teachings of Kunzang Lame Shellung by Patrul Rinpoche." The old monk said to Patrul Rinpoche: "This teaching, The Words of My Perfect Teacher is very easy to understand. As you are a beginner, it's very good for you to study this." Patrul Rinpoche answered: "Thank you!" So then, every day he received the teachings from the Kunzang Lame Shellung.
Then one day when he was arranging his offering bowls on the shrine, Patrul Rinpoche put them in an odd fashion, he put one here and one there, slightly wrong. The old monk came to him and said: "That’s not the way to put out the offering bowls, in the Words of My Perfect Teacher it says they should be straight in a line like beads of a mala. Like this!" Then Patrul Rinpoche said: "Oh, I'm sorry, sorry." And then he put them back properly in a straight line.
Then became the 15th day of the month, the full moon. Patrul Rinpoche said to the old monk: "It's the full moon day, is it all right if I go out to do some circumambulation around the monastery?" The old monk said: "Yes, it's very fine, you can do that. Go quickly, come back quickly." "Yes, yes, oh, thank you." So he went round the monastery circumambulating around it and in the monastery there was actually a student of Patrul Rinpoche, the head lama of that monastery. The lama saw Patrul Rinpoche. He was so surprised he ran down to the road and started prostrating to him and then a lot of people turned up. "What's going on?" He exclaimed: "Patrul Rinpoche is here!" A big crowd was gathering, all getting a blessing from him and prostrating. Patrul Rinpoche was completely surrounded by all the people. So it went a bit late and it came about 12 o'clock. Meanwhile up in the cave the old monk was thinking: "Hmm, it's 12 o'clock, he hasn't come to make my dinner yet. This is really strange. What's going on? It's time to make my food.
He went a bit down and looked down at the monastery what was going on. He looked over in the distance and saw a big crowd of people. Whence he was going down, one person was coming up. He said to the person coming up: "What's going on over there, all the hustle and people?" The monk replied to him and said: "Patrul Rinpoche is in town, everyone has come to meet him!" "My servant, he is probably down there in the crowd as well having his head spun around by seeing Patrul Rinpoche!" So then he just stood there where he was and waited. Then, in front of everybody Patrul Rinpoche said: "Oh dear, I'm late, I'm late, I've got to go now." So everybody followed Patrul Rinpoche in a big line. He said: "Don't come, don't come. I've got to go quickly, don't follow me." As Patrul Rinpoche was going up the side of the hill, the monk who was asked what was going on said: "Look, look, as I told you, there is Patrul Rinpoche coming!" "Looks like my old servant, what's that about then?"
So then he went slowly back to his retreat hut. He was sitting up there looking down. "That's my old man!" Finally he understood who the old man was. Then he was really embarrassed. And he thought: "I'm stupid." He closed the door and the window shutters, locked everything up and just sat inside the house. Patrul Rinpoche was banging on the door: "Sorry, sorry, I'm late! Please open the door!" He went round to the back and there was a little window open. "Sorry, sorry, I've lost the track of the time, I'm late, let me in!" He wouldn't open up. So then Patrul Rinpoche run off to some other district.
So the old monk was really an idiot because he could have invited Patrul Rinpoche in and got all the teachings he wanted.
If we have a lot of suffering and problems arising, we can take it as a very precious opportunity. Likewise for us, we don't have to go and search for the suffering, we get it for free, it comes to us naturally. That's very good, isn't it? We don't even pay a pound for that suffering. We don't have to go and make any specific minute to experience the suffering. It comes to us like a guest.
Well, if suffering and problems are good, how to practice with them? There are three gradual steps. One is the loving-kindness and compassion. At the time one is experiencing suffering and problems one needs to meditate on loving-kindness and compassion. What does it mean to have them? - Everybody likes to experience happiness and everybody wants to be free of the suffering. Everybody is like that. Because you have that wish, then other people also have it. There is no difference at all. Thinking that "May myself and all the sentient beings have happiness," that's the loving-kindness. Having the thought that "May myself and all sentient beings be free from suffering," that's compassion. If one has that attitude it's the opposite or antidote of the ego-clinging.
That way one's mind becomes open and spacious and one has self-confidence, and courage and peacefulness arise. What are the best helpers or friends for the loving-kindness and compassion? - It's the suffering and problems. These problems are like a wind for the loving kindness and compassion. If you have a mountain and forest and there is a little fire there, if a big wind comes and blows on that fire, it will become very big forest fire. Likewise, if you have lot of problems and suffering, these will become friends for the practice of loving-kindness and compassion. They are like a wind which blows up the loving kindness and compassion and makes it greater and greater.
Having the thought of loving-kindness and compassion, first of all one uses objects or people who are very close to one, like one's family and friends, and after some time one goes out to people who are further and further away from one. In the final stage one can be meditating with loving-kindness and compassion for one's enemy. If one is able to meditate like that with one's enemy, that's really good.
If you recognize the thought that I want to have the experience of happiness, I don't want to experience suffering, then everybody else has the identical wishes but normally we don't think about it. Normally we care about ourselves but not really about the other people. That's a mistaken view, isn't it? A normal everyday view. So then, why is the normal view mistaken? - It's because there is no difference between us and other sentient beings. Nobody wants to have suffering and everyone wishes to be happy.
I'm going to give you another example. You've got two big pins. If you put them to your thighs and hit them with a hammer, would you rather have the right leg pierced with a needle or the left leg? Are they both equally good or equally bad or is one better than the other? Audience: Same.
Why are they the same? - The both legs will feel the same sensation. The sensation permeates the whole body. Like that example, our desire to experience the happiness and not wanting to experience the suffering is exactly the same as everybody else's desire to experience happiness and not to experience suffering. So it's the same as having the same feeling in both legs. So you don't have to think: "I want the best for me, and everybody else can have the rest."
Whether one is able to make the loving-kindness and compassion into a very big loving-kindness and compassion, depends on that, how one uses it with other people more and more. If one can do that, then there is a great benefit achieved for oneself and also for the other beings. First of all one has the loving-kindness and compassion which benefits one's family and close relatives, then further on to that all of one's neighbourhood, further to that the whole town or city, and then one goes on to the whole country. If one can have loving kindness capacity for the whole world, then whole world has peace and happiness. Loving-kindness is stronger than an atom bomb. Why is that? If everybody in the world had loving-kindness and compassion in their mind, there would be no work for the atom bomb. It's like getting rid of bombs. As many bombs as there are, they would be useless.
However, if one doesn't practice loving-kindness and compassion much, then there isn't much benefit arising either. If one can practice like this for some time in a continuous fashion, finally one will reach to a level of limitless loving-kindness and compassion. If one can meditate all limitless sentient beings with loving-kindness and compassion, one has achieved the level of limitless loving-kindness and compassion. Based on that, one can practise the bodhicitta mind. If you were to ask: "How can I practise the bodhicitta mind?" I'm one being, who wants to experience happiness and doesn't want to experience suffering. That's one single being. But the other sentient beings, who also don't want to experience suffering and also want to experience happiness, they are much more in number. Then one thinks that I want to bring all sentient beings to the level of realising the nature of their mind, to be free of the suffering, to obtain all of the happiness and ultimately bring them to the level of buddhahood. For that reason I'm going to practise, I'm going to bring them to that state. That's what we call bodhicitta mind.
So, there are three: Loving kindness and compassion, limitless loving-kindness and compassion and the bodhicitta mind. These are three different stages. What are the best friends or helpers for the bodhicitta mind? - The conflicting emotions and the mind poisons, they are the best friends.
If you were to sit in a nice beautiful house and never be for wanting food or drink, always eating well and in comfortable situation thinking: "I'm attending the loving-kindness and compassion…" There is that situation, and the second situation is at he moment when one is experiencing the problems, mind poisons and conflicting emotions. If one meditated in a peaceful place for hundred years or spent few years with the conflicting emotions arising, then the few years of the suffering is much more beneficial to one's bodhicitta-mind than hundred years sitting in a comfortable place thinking "I'm practising bodhicitta."
I'm going to give you another story of the Patrul Rinpoche. He had a student, very proud one. "I understand all about the loving-kindness and compassion, it's really easy." But if you really think about, he didn't know how to do it. Patrul Rinoche said to him: "You don't really understand this. You have to from the bottom of your heart learn how to practice this loving-kindness and compassion, you have to understand it. Especially you have to train loving-kindness and compassion with suffering and mind poisons." The student thought: "I don't need to look at that, I understand that."
There is a place in Kham called Khatok. On the other side of a hill the sun was coming up, the proud student went outside his place and was sitting just as the sun was coming up. He covered his head with his zen (cloth) and just sat there with his eyes almost closed. He was thinking: "I'm practising the loving kindness and compassion." The student was sitting just by a stupa and then along came Patrul Rinpoche in his disguise as the old man again, circumambulating the stupa. With a nice voice he said to the proud monk: "Kusha-la (sir), what kind of practice are you doing? Please tell me." The monk didn't see very clearly. "I'm practising the loving-kindness and compassion, hmm." Patrul Rinpoche said: "That's very good, wonderful…" He went around once more. When he reached back to where the proud student was sitting he said again: "What are you doing, what are you practising, please tell me." "I'm practising loving-kindness and compassion," the student answered slightly irritated. Again the teacher went off round the stupa and when he reached in front of the student third time, he said: "Oh, please tell me what you are doing now, what are you practising?" "What's wrong with you? I'm practising the loving kindness and compassion!!!" he shouted. Patrul Rinpoche said: "Is that how your loving-kindness and compassion is?" Then the student cleared his eyes and looked. He saw his own lama talking to him and he became really embarrassed. Then he defeated his pride. Afterwards he got very good practice and very good activity. He became a very good practitioner.
Now we are going to practise together the loving-kindness and compassion related to the suffering and conflicting emotions. Whatever suffering you are particularly experiencing at the moment, any of you, that's okay, that's fine. First of all one thinks about that. If you don't have any suffering present in your mind now, just think about suffering you had a while ago, some previous suffering. So then, think about your suffering, present or past, and be relaxed. And you think: "How I have suffering now, all the sentient beings also have things like that, suffering like that. The sentient beings are the same as myself." Then slowly one breathes inwards. On one's in-breath one is breathing in all the sufferings, problems and negativities of sentient beings, they get drawn into oneself and combine with one's own suffering. Think like that again and again. You don't need to think about that when you are breathing out. Just on the in-breath. (Meditation.)
Then one thinks in one's mind that all the suffering of sentient beings, what they are experiencing, is combined with your suffering and it becomes like a representative of all their suffering. May it come to my suffering and may I experience all of it. (Meditation.)
Then, because of the way one's attitude has changed one's suffering has become very meaningful. Your suffering is purifying all your obscurations and accumulating merit, therefore it is meaningful. One meditates on the suffering as joy. (Meditation.) Then, don't think about anything to do with suffering, just sit relaxed. Don't do anymore sending and taking, just shinay.
On the out-breath one feels that all of one's virtuous actions, one's positive energy goes out combined with the blessings of the buddhas and bodhisattvas together. These come out and dissolve into all sentient beings. One meditates like that and thinks this again and again with the out-breath. You don't have to think about the in-breath anymore, just think about the out-breath. (Meditation.) Again, just relax. If one has practiced the nature of mind, rest in that. (Meditation.)
Now we are going to meditate together with the in-breath. One thinks that all the negativity of sentient beings' suffering together with one's own suffering is absorbed to oneself and on the out-breath one's positivity, one's accumulated merit together with the blessing of the buddhas and bodhisattvas is going all out to sentient beings. So, one is concentrating on both the in-breath with suffering and on the out-breath with all the virtues. One is meditating on both of them. Do that, please. (Meditation.) Again relax. If you know how to look at the nature of mind, then look, who is doing the sending and taking. Look at that. See the naturally arising clarity. If one doesn't know about nature of mind, then rest in the shine. (Meditation.) That's finished.
There are two kinds of methods in the sending and taking practice. One is focused based on yourself, one is focused on your emotion and your suffering. Normally when we practice tonglen, sending and taking practice, we take suffering to ourselves and we don't focus on our emotions and our own suffering. We don't take in our own suffering. We take something to ourselves. That's very good, wonderful, but there is one problem: if you have anger, if you have emotion and suffering, you cannot remember [the remedy] quickly, maybe you forgot. Now this method is to focus on your own suffering and emotions. Why? If you practise with that, later, if you have emotions and suffering, it is easy to bring into practise and transform it. But you can do both ways and change methods. Are there any questions?
Question: What if one is suffering from an acute mental illness and the suffering is too great to bear and use?
Rinpoche: Generally speaking, if one has a very strong, overwhelming emotion, very strong mental problem, it is a bit difficult. If one becomes mentally ill, then it is very difficult to use it. Then one's experience is like the baby-experience. When one becomes crazy one doesn't realise or recognize that. If one is not clinically insane, even though one has a very strong mental problem, first when one practises like this, it doesn't seem to be of any benefit, but over the period of time there will be a benefit arising from that. The strength of the problem gets less and less.
If you can understand that you are crazy, then you are not really crazy. Then you are able to practise. By doing bit by bit you get better and better. Be relaxed and peaceful and there is great benefit from that. One recognises the essence of grasping and one doesn't have clinging to the defilements.
Question: From time to time people become angry with me. It doesn't matter whether the person is right or wrong, I don't know how to react to that. Could Rinpoche please give me a method, how to deal with other people's anger directed towards me?
Rinpoche: It's based on having loving-kindness and compassion and also practising patience. If you have patience one time and second time and if it doesn't help the third time, then you have to think. Really looking at this clearly: who has got the fault here? Is my fault greater or is that person's fault greater? If it is your fault, you can look a solution to change that. If it's the other person's fault and he keeps on going with it, it can't be very good for both of you.
Based on your loving-kindness and compassion you can challenge the angry person because he has the fault and problems. For the benefit of the angry person himself and also for other people's benefit, based on those two reasons, you can challenge him with loving-kindness and compassion. But you don't have to say bad words to him (you are stupid and no good etc.). You have to give a reason: "This is not good what you did, because…" If he or she says lots of things back to you and doesn't listen, then you just continue giving reasons. If you continue with logic and explain the harm, the angry person has got many opportunities to realise their fault. Because you are practising with patience, you have been patient three times, haven't you? By the time you have been patient three times, maybe the other person will think: "Hmm, perhaps he has got a point here; maybe it is true, what you say." If you don’t have patience even one time and you come together fighting, then you become closed. The other person is like a closed door and you close your door as well. Neither of you can see their own fault. The other guy thinks it's your fault and you think it's the other guy's fault. Then you collide. If you practice first, second and third time, if the person still carries on being angry, then you can challenge them with loving-kindness and compassion, and then they have many opportunities to recognize their fault.
Sönam deji tam-che zig-pa nyi
tob-ne nye-pei dra nam pam che ne
tse ga na chi palab drupa ji
sipe cho-le dro va drol-var sho.
Due to this good karma, may I achieve omniscience,
Defeat the harmful enemies within me,
And free beings from the sea of existence
That is churned by the waves of birth, ageing, sickness and death.
Good morning, tashi deleg, good luck, onni, bonjour. Yesterday it was explained how to reverse the attitude of thinking that one doesn't want the suffering, and also how to practise with joy when the suffering arises. Normally we don't want suffering and we think suffering is not good. How to change that attitude, that has been explained. Having a lot of pointless suffering, there is no benefit to that and also it can make the situation worse. Why is there no benefit to worry? - If one has a method to get out of the suffering, to remedy the situation, there is no point worrying about it. And if one hasn't got a remedy for the situation, even then there is no need to worry about it, because the worry doesn't make the situation better at all, doesn't affect it. That was the explanation given yesterday. Worrying will make the situation worse: when the suffering arises, if you look at it, even the suffering was a small one, worrying makes it bigger or worse. Then one has many pointless worries, one worries for no purpose.
I know a man who normally is quite a happy person, he has a happy frame of mind, but he said he had one problem. The difficult he had was that the day and night went very quickly. The moon goes round the earth very quickly and the earth goes around the sun very quickly. So he thought like that. Maybe one day the earth and moon are going to collide together. Who knows whether it's going to happen or not, but that's what the man thought. So he could not sleep because of this worry. He said: "I'm normally quite happy, but all my happiness was lost because I'm worrying about the planets colliding.
In the first case he just had an idea about that. Gradually he started to believe in it more and made it worse. As I said yesterday, if everything is lost: your work or your money is lost, you can always have a new plan and new idea and make a new work. If one doesn't have suffering in one's mind, one can make a new plan and have a new idea, what to do. If one worries about everything and becomes more and more tight in one's mind, then one will be going crazy. So then the first topic or the first subject about changing the attitude regarding suffering as unwanted, that has been explained.
The second subject to be discussed now is how to have joy when the suffering arises. How can you say when the suffering arises there is any benefit for one? - If one has the opportunity at that moment to transform it into a friend. It's said from the suffering in the world there is one benefit for the human being who is suffering: they can have another idea. Wisdom (prajna) can arise. They can have a new method to release the suffering. If one is a practitioner, based on that one can eventually reach on the level of buddhahood. If one is in the god realm, for example, they don't have any suffering. They don't have any practise because of that. Just singing and dancing. And they stay there millions of years. One day they die and there is no benefit to it, just singing and being distracted all the time, what's the benefit of that? After dying they go down to the lower realms. And then they go up and down again. When you say "cyclic existence," it means going round and round, doesn't it. Maybe building up, going to the god realms, and then going down to the human realms, animal realms, hell realms and then back up to humans', demigods' and gods' realms again. Round and round. It's like having a vase or pot and a bee inside or an insect. You put the lid on and it goes round and round in the vase. It's like that, the cyclic existence.
What's the way of liberating from that? - The view of the emptiness and the view of the nature of mind. With those two one can gain freedom. We can free ourselves from that because the basis of the cyclic existence is the grasping, so we can free ourselves from the grasping and then one is freed from the cyclic existence, clinging to reality of things. When one is liberated from grasping to reality, then one is freed from samsara, because the essence of samsara is nirvana. But in the god realm they don't have any suffering, so they can't practise. Without suffering they have nothing to base their practise on, because there is no suffering, they don't do anything. They don't look forwards supposing what's going to happen afterwards; with no suffering they have no idea of looking in the future. The meaning of the practise is to free oneself from suffering and based on the suffering one can gain freedom. But they don't have that. If one uses the suffering one has, using the suffering both can be liberated - the suffering and oneself.
If one can transform the suffering, when it arises, into a friend, then that's the real way of having joy when suffering arises. One transforms it into a friend. If one just has the idea that when the suffering comes, I'm going to be happy, that'll be good, if one just has the idea, there is some benefit, but not the real benefit. It's not full. Along with the idea you also need to practise it. So, what is the practice? As was explained it's the practice of loving-kindness and compassion. And then there is also another method. Yesterday was explained the practice of loving kindness and compassion with suffering. Today the practice of loving-kindness and compassion with the conflicting emotions will be explained.
Whatever emotions one has in the mind: desire, anger, jealousy, pride and so on, in the beginning when one is starting to practice with the emotions, it's not good to practise with the too strong ones, you try to do small emotions and go on from that in a gradual way. One doesn't have the ability to practise with the strong emotions at the first stage, to do that so well, when one is starting the practice. There is a benefit from practising with the strong emotion, but one doesn't really see a great result, so therefore don't try with the big ones immediately. But if you want to, it's okay, it's not a fault. Although there is a great benefit you don't see it yourself. If you begin with the small emotions, then you start to see the actual benefit and result much clearer. Therefore it is suggested that you practise with the small ones first.
Now we are going to practise together related to emotions. One seen whatever is present in one's mind at the moment: the anger, the jealousy, the desire, pride and so, whatever is there, whatever is manifesting, you see that. (Meditation.) Realising that whatever emotion one has in one's own mind all sentient beings also possess emotions similar to that. Based on these emotions they all have suffering. Because of the unbearable suffering the sentient beings have, one gives arise to compassion for them. (Meditation.)
Having compassion for the sentient beings who are also experiencing the emotional states like oneself, one thinks that in my emotion, whatever it is, anger etc., may all of the sentient beings' emotions enter that and you think it is combined together with your emotions. One takes the emotions of all sentient beings and makes it one with one's own emotions. Your emotion is like a representative of all the sentient beings' emotion. On the in-breath one imagines that all the emotions of the sentient beings come onto breath and combine with one's own emotion, and one is taking it all away from the sentient beings on the breath, once one gently breathes in. Just think of the in-breath and breathe in gently. One can imagine that all the emotions of the sentient beings has a colour like a grey, dark smoke, one can think like that if one wants to. (Meditation.)
Then have a relaxed mind. For those of you who know how to look at the nature of mind, one looks at the meditator of the sending and taking and keeps resting in that state. Those of you, who don't know about the nature of mind, relax in the shine state. (Meditation.) That's finished. Then one thinks that all the emotions of sentient beings have been combined with your emotions and transformed. Thinking that one has taken on all the emotions of the sentient beings, they are all free of those emotions now.
Now we are going to concentrate on the out-breath. Right now the taking in the emotions of the sentient beings has generated lot of virtuous merit. Based on the vast amount of merit one has accumulated now, one adds to that one's own merit and joy what you already have and then all the merit and blessing and joy of the buddhas and bodhisattvas. One thinks that all goes out through the medium of one's out-breath in a very clear and bright light. One sends this out to all sentient beings and it dissolves into them and they obtain all of that. So first, please relax. On the out-breath have that feeling when one is breathing outwards in a gentle way. (Meditation.)
For those of you who know how to think about the nature of mind, one looks at that which is sending and taking, and then one relaxes in that state. For those of you, who don't know about that, one relaxes in the shinay. (Meditation)
You can train in this way: When you breathe in, on the in-breath you think you are taking in the emotions, when breathing out, you are breathing out the virtue. So that one in-breath plus one out-breath are counted as one breath, one can feel that's one cycle of breathing. If you can do like that, that's fine. You can do them separately, or you can do them together, either way is fine. That completes the explanation how to relate to the suffering and emotions with the loving-kindness and compassion and the bodhicitta.
In Tibet there was the previous incarnation of Situ Rinpoche, Pema Wangyal Gyalpo. He was very wrathful. Although his appearance was very wrathful, in his heart he was full of compassion and loving-kindness. From time to time, if he needed, he shouted at somebody and that person's defilements and their sickness and faults would be gone. Sometimes he would even beat somebody and if they had a long term sickness which couldn't be cured, it was gone when he hit them. Sometimes he would argue and shout at somebody: "You haven't done this right!" It is said that if one is being very angry to somebody and shouting at them, if one has perfected sending and taking when one was breathing in, one is taking in all their suffering and all their difficulty from that person, and when one is breathing out and shouting, then one is sending out all of the virtue and blessing. So if one has got that ability, one can do it like that. He said he could do it.
Some people who were very sick and had a long time disease, they went to visit previous Tai Situ Rinpoche and they tried to upset him on purpose by doing some mistake, so that he would become angry. They made a connection between themselves and the lama. Even if the lama hits them, from that cause there would be a very good connection arising. Because of the lama's shouting and beating, the disease can be purified that way because of the connection. That's why, if someone attends a high level, if they practise sending and taking, it is beneficial for both. If you have some karmic connection, the other person's disease and emotion are purified. The benefit for you, because you are taking and have already given up your ego, you have bodhicitta mind, this way you accumulate lot of merit and positive things. You can purify your disease and emotions, your obscurations. This way there is a benefit for both.
Some people think: "If I take away or heal that person, I will have that person's bad things going into me and I can not remove that problem. How can I…uhhh!" That means you have connected with ego. You cannot give up your ego. That’s why some influence can come to you, because you need to protect yourself and the other, both. "If I heal them, then more patience is coming for me. That's very good, I have more 'money'." You have very big ego and because of that ego other people influence on you a little bit. But if you have small ego, you have more protection. Egoless is your shield, compassion is your shield. Nobody can harm you. There is no way to enter inside. That's why it's said the loving-kindness and compassion are the best type of shield one can have.
Now I'm going to tell you a story. In Tibet in a place called Gagyab there is one lama there, who doesn't have any compassion or loving-kindness, he doesn't have the view of emptiness, he doesn't have a clear idea of the development stage, just maybe half of it and he is meditating on his deity called Shinje (Mahakala). He is meditating on this thinking: "I am very wrathful." In the development stage he is able to accomplish maybe half of it. Why is that? - Because he is missing the view of emptiness and he is missing the view of the loving-kindness and compassion. He is not able to complete his practice but it's going in a mistaken way, it's not complete. Even though he is not able to do the complete development stage practice he is able to transform his body into the form of the deity. So he looks like a deity.
This lama has got lots of wheat grains and around the country there is a famine and nobody else has got any grains, so the people go up to him starving and asking: "Please give us some grain." He denies. All the surrounding villages are starving and they want him to give them some food, but he won't give it. He hasn't any compassion and based on that he won't give them anything.
The villagers gather together and think: "What can we do about this?" "I know, burn the lama up in his cave to death and then we will have the grain." So in the lama's house they set a fire. The lama is burning in the fire. Just before the fire happened, somebody gave the lama a very filthy apron and there is lots of obscuration and dirtiness connected with the apron. Normally the lama is able to fly up in the air whenever he wants to but this time the smoke is burning from the fire and he can't see what's going on. So he grabs the apron, which is covered with dirtiness and impurities and he thinks it's his tsugu (a yellow robe). So he wraps it around his head and tries to fly off to the sky as he normally does. But at this point he can't, because the dirty apron is full of obscuration.
So the lama became very angry and he made a very bad prayer. He attends to make a prayer saying that in the world may I pick all the suffering and bring it to this place to harm all the people on this area. But he misspoke himself; he didn't say like that, he said that may I bring all the benefit to all the people to this area. Although his intention was bad, he didn't say the right words. He became a very evil nasty demon in his next life. We call him Dragyab Dongde. So then he gave a lot of harm to many people.
Then there was a Rinpoche called Khamtrul Rinpoche. Another great lama called Khyentse Wangpo said to Khamtrul Rinpoche: "You go to that Dragyab's place and defeat that demon. You need to go there right away." So then Khamtrul Rinpoche arrived there and through his clairvoyance he could see, that Dragyab Dongde, the bad demon was sitting in a big tent wearing a big yellow hat, with all his disciples attending him. He could see this in a pure vision. Khamtrul Rinpoche walked to this big tent where the demon was residing, and the attendants and disciples of the demon could not see Khamtrul Rinpoche.
When he got to the tent the demon said: "Hmm, how is it that you got here then?" He jumped off his throne and grabbed Khamtrul Rinpoche by the throat. Whatever Khamtrul Rinpoche tried to do wasn't of any use. The demon was grabbing him harder and harder by the throat. Then Khamtrul Rinpoche meditated himself as a wrathful deity and the demon just laughed. "That's nothing." Then the demon transformed himself in a form of Shinje, a really big form, bigger than Khamtrul Rinpoche. On his right leg was a mountain range and on his left leg there was another mountain range. Khamtrul Rinpoche's manifestation could not even get up to his navel. He was really surprised: "Oh, compassion..." Khamtrul Rinpoch gave rise to compassion because he thought: "Well this demon has got the power to manifest in such a big form, he has the ability to do that, but because he has got no compassion and loving-kindness, he is going around in samsara. Oh, dear!" He just generated a lot of compassion for him and then he started to cry. The big demon fell over. The demon spoke up and said: "Yes, because I have not acted on basis of loving-kindness and compassion I have taken birth as a demon. That's the cause. Now I'm going to be your disciple. Whatever you say, I'll listen to that." Khamtrul Rinpoche gave a commitment to the demon: "You must not cause harm to any beings." Later on he didn't cause any harm to beings.
If one can practise as the story states practising with loving-kindness and compassion for a non-human being, there is benefit from that. Likewise there is benefit from practising loving-kindness and compassion for human beings. That completes the explanation of all the methods of loving-kindness and compassion.
What will be explained now is how to relate with using the shinay, calm abiding meditation. There are two types of shine. Generally we are talking about sending and taking, just explained. Generally we can say that the sending and taking technique is the loving-kindness and compassion joined with shinay. When one is doing the sending and taking technique, one is not distracted. So that's called shinay, not distracted. Along with that one has got two things: the loving kindness and compassion. This single method of sending and taking combines the shinay and the practice of loving-kindness and compassion together as a union, so in one practise you have these two things. What is the essence of the shinay really? - It's the non-distractedness or the mindfulness.
And shinay has two aspects: with object or support and without support. Shinay meditation without object is just relaxing. The relaxed state is rather like someone who has completed a very big job and then finished the job, that type of relaxation. So, if you have been going up and down a mountain, and you get half way up, you are tired, aren't you? Then one sits back with a sigh. It's like that relaxation, spacious. Like that the actual openness and spaciousness will be there. You don't have to block the thoughts; actually you can't block the thoughts.
I'm giving you an example. One may have this thought in the beginning: "Oh, I need to go to somewhere to listen to the teachings and if I went to do that that would be good." One has that idea, and if one has the thought of coming here, arriving to Samye Ling and the temple and thinking: "It's very good, I'm going to listen to the teachings. I'm going to stay here for a while," even though one had this idea of coming here and one has arrived here and one has planned to stay here, if all of a sudden outside the doors there were two policemen, two armed guards with guns and they would say: "The Scottish Government has reclaimed that you can't go anywhere else in the country, you've got to stay here, you can't go anywhere outside Samye Ling", and they got a big gun and a helmet, like a military army, staring at you, not smiling, how would you feel? Your idea of staying there pleasantly wouldn't be there, would it? "How can I get out of here, what's the reason for this? I don't think things are going to be good now. How can I escape?" You would think like that, wouldn't you?
So it's the same as that. If you were thinking: "Thoughts are no good, I must block all thoughts. Emotions are no good, suffering is no good, I need only peace. Relax!!" You will never be happy then because that wanting obstructs the thoughts. One doesn't need to block the thoughts. One doesn't need to follow the thoughts. Following the thoughts means thinking: "What about this and that, what happened then," etc.
There was a guy called Famous Moon's Father. He was very poor. After begging for some time he finally obtained a big sack of rice, and he had a big grasping for this sack of rice. He wasn't eating it but took it into a house. There was a big beam in the house and he tied the sack onto the beam and had it hanging there. Then he lied below it on a bed, looking up, gazing at this big sack of rice. First he thought: "A thief might come in, so I have to keep an eye on the rice. Before he slept he was thinking a lot. "Now that I've got this big amount of rice, what am I going to do with it? Maybe I sell it. If I sell it I get profit and twice as much. Then I sell it again and get more, four times more. Eventually I shall become really rich. When I get rich, what am I going to do? I have to buy a house, of course. Once I buy a house, what shall I do next? I'll buy all kinds of different nice things which will make the house pretty. I have to have a servant as well. What next? Oh, I'm going to have a nice wife. Then what? Of course she will have a baby. What name shall I give to the baby, I have to think of a good name. Since he wasn't very clever, he couldn't think of a very good name. He was thinking again and again. "It's really important to have a good name." At that moment through the open window the moon shone down and it touched his head. "This is a good sign. I'm going to call my son The Famous Moon," and he became very happy. While he was thinking of all this, a little mouse was coming along the beam. The mouse was eating the rope which tied up the sack of rice. At the moment when he thought: "I'm going to call my son "Famous Moon," the mouse finished gnawing through the rope, the rope snapped, the sack of rice fell on his head killing him instantly.
So, if one doesn't have this thinking: "What am I going to do, what shall I do next," that's fine. If thoughts arise, that's fine, but when the thoughts come up and one loses the idea "I'm meditating", you lose yourself, even, and one is thinking: "What shall I do, what shall I do," that's not correct. Apart from that, whatever thoughts arise, it's okay. They come, they manifest, and they disappear. Within that one relaxes. Easy isn't it? If that's not easy enough for you, there is something that is little bit difficult and this is based on the breathing.
So, one relaxes in the mind. Put your attention to the breath going out and in. You don't have to visualise anything. Just observe the breath. We do that meditation together now. First one rests in a shine without object, just relax. (Meditation.) Then observe the breath, please. (Meditation.) Without specifically looking, just relax the mind. (Meditation.) So that's finished.
Now I'm going to explain how we can use the practise of shinay with emotions. The Buddha has taught that the essence of all sentient beings is very pure and good. Sentient beings' basic goodness is perfect and clean. The nature of our mind is very excellent and perfect. Why is that? - Because it's the essence of buddhanature. We have the emotions, don't we? The emotions, such as anger, jealousy, pride and so on, these are not our essence. And also depression, loneliness and sadness, these are not our nature. So, what is our nature - It's very clean and clear. It's like a flame of a butter lamp which is very clear and clean. Our essence is open and the emotions, such as anger, jealousy and depression are not mixed with that essence, they are separate from it.
So, look at the anger, inwardly. One looks deeper and deeper. Look at the essence of the anger. You don't have to think it in a logical way, just based on your feeling, observing it. Look at it again, deeper, deeper, deeper, into the essence of the anger, look at that now. First just be relaxed. (Meditation.) Give rise to some emotion, whatever it is. Now observe it, look at the emotion. Deeper and deeper. Look in a relaxed way, very relaxed. You don't need to look very strongly, just barely looking. (Meditation.) That's finished. How was that?
- The emotion had nowhere to hide, it just vanished.
- It felt like lighting a candle in a light room.
Rinpoche: How did the new people feel like?
- At first it seemed to be solid and as it was said to look in a relaxed way, it became less and less solid.
- The experience was spacious, clear and open but the emotion seemed to be something quite separate.
- At first the emotion seemed to be quite thick and after having looked at it for a while it became thinner and thinner.
Question: Why is it sometimes taught that the essence of thoughts is dharmakaya and at other times thoughts are described as separate from the dharmakaya, which is it?
Rinpoche: If one recognises them, they are the same, if one doesn't recognize them, they are separate. The separation is an illusion. The way they are, they are the same. If one doesn't recognize, then the way they appear is separate.
Question: Is cyclic existence identical to inherent existence?
Rinpoche: The inherent existence, which is basically something really existing, having the idea of something really existing, from that come all the six realms and whole of samsara. So, having that first set up as inherent existence, the misperception of something truly existing, everything else comes from that. Really there is no samsara. No circling, it's an illusion, it's a way of appearing, it's nature is that it doesn't really exist.
Question: If one is clinically insane and has a very great difficulty and the taught methods don't work, what should one do?
Rinpoche: Generally speaking the methods can benefit some people and other people don't benefit that much, but in this specific situation of being clinically insane, as much as one can make aspiration and dedication of one's merit, that's very beneficial. As to the methods working or not, if one has a slight understanding, one can build on that, so, one starts off with the slight understanding and then it grows. If one has got no mindfulness, one can't think of anything because of the madness, then there is not much benefit one can achieve. So then one makes a wishing aspiration to accomplish something. In a place where a person, who is ill, resides, the names of the Buddha and so on can be recited, so they can hear them. Also various mantras can be recited, so that they can hear them. There will be benefit from that.
Generally speaking when we talk about benefiting sentient beings, sometimes we have benefiting activity and it does actually benefit them. Other times it doesn't benefit them. Why is that? - It's because all the sentient beings have to carry their own karma related to them. Everybody has got their own individual karma. We can't totally benefit others but we accomplish as much as we are able to. I'm going to use my intelligence to accomplish benefit for them. I'm going to use all the various methods at my disposal to help them. Sometimes it will meet with a good result, other times it won't. So everybody has got different types of karma. For that reason some people benefit and some people won't. If one is not able to benefit a person, then don't be sad about that. You can still have the attitude of trying again and again.
Question: Doing a devotional prayer like Dorje Chang Tungma or the prayer for the 35 Buddhas we are taught to visualise all these Buddhas, imagining them to be present as one is making the confession. If one is unable to do that, is there any benefit from just reciting the prayer?
Rinpoche: There is benefit. Thinking that this has come from the Buddha, these are the names of the various Buddhas, there is benefit. And thinking that this is beneficial for all sentient beings, then there is definitely benefit from that, yes.
We leave the questions now. The method given is extremely simple, but it's very beneficial. The external emotions are very coarse. If we go looking deeper and deeper into the nature or the essence of these gross emotions, you will meet your essence. And that's very clean and completely pure. If one can do that method, then all of one's emotions will be transformed into supports of one's practice, the shine, calm-abiding meditation. When one has the experience of anger, jealousy, pride and so on, then one has a lot of opportunity at that moment to practise the shinay. If one doesn't have that view, then one just sits there without thinking much anything, there isn't much benefit, is there? It's like the god realm. There is nothing to observe because there is no emotions, nothing going on. Very peaceful, no disturbing emotions.
When one has these very strong emotions coming up like the anger and so on, one has two methods: one can practise the meditation of loving kindness and compassion and the second one is just barely observing the essence of emotion. So one goes deeper and deeper, not in an intellectual way, but with the feeling. You don't have to do it forcefully but very gently. Just barely observing.
You've all listened very well and attentively, thank you very much. And also you have given up your precious weekend which you normally use for running all over doing all kinds of interesting things…(laughter)..you have given that up and come here to listen to the teachings. Everybody from the Samye Ling Monastery they have created the situation for all this to happen and the people have done all the preparations, thank you very much. I think from all of the different places I've been in Europe, Samye Ling has got the best place for the dharma, that's my experience. The monastery is very good; Akong Rinpoche and Lama Yeshe Rinpoche both are extremely good. In that way all the environment in Samye Ling is very good.
We are going to dedicate all the roots of virtue we've gathered together from listening and practising dharma together, for the benefit of all sentient beings. Temporarily we will remove their suffering up until complete awakening to the total buddhahood and for that end we dedicate all the made for the world peace. Saying the prayers together and thinking - keeping that in mind - we do the prayers.
Sönam deji tam-che zig-pa nyi
tob-ne nye-pei dra nam pam che ne
tse ga na chi palab drupa ji
sipe cho-le dro va drol-var sho.
Due to this good karma, may I achieve omniscience,
Defeat the harmful enemies within me,
And free beings from the sea of existence
That is churned by the waves of birth, ageing, sickness and death.